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Negativity...the Voices in Your Head

Posted on July 18, 2014 at 9:40 AM

I listed this post under stress management and personal development because I truly believe that the negative energy in our lives is what creates the majoirty of our stress, and to learn how to better cope with that is the key to great personal development. Whether the negativity be in the form of other people, our own thoughts and self talk or our actual environment itself.


Bad news travels faster than good - we all know that do we not?


I tried a little experiement a while back and found it oddly amusing when I saw the results.


You should try it....


Post a positive comment or thought or experience to your Facebook and see how much activity you get. Then post something negative - bet you can tell me before even doing it what will happen. Seems misery loves company hey? You know, we all have the friends that you only hear from when things are going poorly? Yeah, I have them as well. You know as soon as you see the message in your inbox or the number on your phone.


But not only do we have those people in our lives but they can live in our heads too. We can be our own worst enemy when it comes to the negativity in our lives but the even scarier part is that we are so unaware of the thoughts that go through our minds - regularly - that we are oblivious to the effect that they can have on us. 


We all have negative tapes that run in our minds. It might be the words of the fourth grade bully, the taunting of your sibling, the criticism of a parent, the rejection of a former boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse, a judgemental friend, a critical in law.....the words may have been theirs but the voice now? It is yours. 


Listen to it. 


What is it saying? What is it telling you over and over again?


Is it right? Is what that voice says true? Maybe you failed. Or maybe your made a mistake. But does that make YOU a failure or a mistake?


Now pay attention to how you feel. How your energy changes. Ebbs and flows, or maybe becomes stagnant. Each and everytime you hear (or even when you don't hear, when you are unaware) the voices, the tapes, there is a physical reaction in your body. The same is true for every time you tell a story to someone else or repeat the details of an event, you relive the emotions as well as the physical reactions. (This also places the body in a "fight or flight" response which means that the nervous system is stimulated, increasing blood pressure, respiration, heart rate, cortisol levels, etc, etc, etc.)


There is a physical response to your thoughts as well as your words - whether they are spoken outloud or not.



Back to the voice. Listen to it. Acknowledge it. Become aware of it. Now CHALLENGE IT! Ask yourself if what those voices say are true. When we get into a negative space it is easy to run with it, catastrophize, blow everything out of proportion. When one thing goes wrong, all of a sudden it seems like EVERYTHING is going wrong. But is it? Or is it just a reaction to what is going on in your head, your perception of things.



Remember: nothing is inherently good or bad, everything simply is what it is. But we label things as good or based based on our perceptions and experiences.



So listen to that voice, recognize that it is there, question it, challenge it and when you realize that it is wrong (and here's a hint, it always is) you can move forward with that tape no longer a part of your repetoire. With practice it becomes easier to hear those voices and once you can recognize them for the lies that they tell you can begin to eliminate more and more negativity from your life. But you might also notice something else....as the negative energy is replaced with the truth you will begin to recognize much more positive energy in your life as well.


As they say, like attracts like. So what are you attracting?



Health and Happiness,

Lesley

Categories: Stress Management & Self Care, Personal Development

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